The moment after the mistake
The clearest sign of an experienced group is what happens in the possession after something goes wrong. Inexperienced teams accelerate: they take the first available shot to correct the scoreboard immediately. Settled teams slow down and run something. That difference is not motivational, it is procedural, and it decides many close games without ever being named in the highlights.
Tempo as a leadership act
Controlling pace is a leadership behaviour with a visible signature. Someone has to decide that the next forty seconds will be deliberate, communicate it without a timeout, and then be trusted enough that four teammates comply. Watch for the player who gets that compliance; it is rarely the loudest one, and it is not always the best one.
Say what you mean
The reason the word grates is that it is often used as a substitute for analysis, especially about players whose contribution is hard to quantify. The fix is not to drop the concept but to be specific: describe the tempo change, the coverage call, the possession that was rescued. Once described, leadership stops being a compliment and becomes evidence.